Loving Diversity

I’ve never understood why I’ve always enjoyed living in the midst of diverse cultures. In my youth, bored in my suburban white high school, I transferred into an almost all black and Asian inner city school. I loved dwelling in the midst of the new social richness. As an adult, I’ve lived in Hawaii for…

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Ego

I’ve known a work colleague and his wife, David and Sally, for thirty years. I’d always considered them both to be boring. Recently, I became aware that, for all these years, I’d been silently criticizing David as not doing his job very well.  If only he’d do X or Y, he’d do so much better,…

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Holding My Breath

Driving over the Ko’olau mountains on Oahu with a guest from Europe, we came to the Tetsuo Harano tunnel and I felt the old childhood impulse to hold my breath. All my youthful friends and neighbors adhered to this custom, so I assumed it was a common practice. I asked my friend if she and…

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Spontaneous Acts of Kindness

“Do your little bit of good where you are; it’s those little bits of good put together that overwhelm the world.” Archbishop Desmond Tutu As I stroll on a city sidewalk, I see a young mother gently instruct her two-year-old to move over, to make room for me on the walkway. I say a heartfelt,…

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Human Story Lines

When I meet someone, their attitudes and assumptions often reveal underlying themes that define them. The most common personal script is: “Here’s how important I am.” Each time I visit my cousin, she shows off her five boats to me, a non-boat-owner. Another popular self-concept is: “I know best and others should copy me.” An…

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Refrigerator Angel

One day a few years ago, my oversized and ancient refrigerator, inherited when I moved into a thirty-year old condo, exhaled one last cold breath and died. I read on Google that this type of machine, with its motor balanced on top, required special handling. I quizzed the movers that I interviewed as to whether…

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My Favorite Illusions

In college, I took a class on Buddhism and I learned, for the first time, that I needed to discover the illusions that ruled my life. I remember thinking, What are they talking about? I don’t have any delusions. Life is straightforward. I work to earn my way through college. That’s it. I conveniently ignored…

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A Lesson from Death

“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.” Henry David Thoreau Can someone’s death force me to see hard realities I wouldn’t have seen otherwise? Two years ago, an old friend, Josie, said she had emailed and phoned to…

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The Last Laugh

My cousin’s mom, Miyoko, not quite five feet tall with two silver streaks running through her short, dark hair, stood out in my life as the only devoted religious person I knew. She arranged flowers in the traditional ikebana style to place on the altar of the Seattle Betsuin, the largest Buddhist temple in the…

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Big Ego

The other day, a big sign popped up on my inner mental screen: Ego Alert. When I saw this signal, I knew to stop. I relaxed, became thoughtful and asked myself, Am I able to release my ego from this situation?” Ninety-nine percent of the time, the answer I’ve heard in my mind was, Yes.…

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